I am back to writing

 I put the story on the back burner for a while, but I was returning to writing the Tales of Chandra on AO3, and I found out I was writing just for me. 

I don't have support; I realized this when three friends just stabbed me in the back and expected me to just fold. I wrote down how I felt, but was told that I was wrong. I have no idea what kind of work I can do as an author, but I realized that I am just too stupid sometimes. 

I was never really thinking about what I want in my life; I would rather just write my stories and not worry about so many people thinking I am good. I think that it is better to just write down what I like and then continue to write and think maybe if the story is good enough I can publish it myself or try to find people who want to read it. 

Having people like Angel, Tonnia, Jeremy, and Cherryblossomcosplay/Jennifer making fun of my work and then saying I am the bad guy. I decided to just write and hope that I can never see them ever again. I want to move to another place, but I can't. 

I hope that one day, I will write a story that is amazing. 

I never realized how alone I really am as an author. I know that now, since I wrote the Dragon's of Chandra, Tales of Chandra, and The Dragon's Library, that nobody wants to read them. I am not sure how to talk about a book series I write and think about often. 

I am wondering if I should continue to write the stories and then think about maybe pitching or just ditching. I don't know; I wish I did.

Finding out that the people who I thought supported me were not who they were. I can't believe Tonnia and Jeremy were laughing at my dream. They made fun of me; I just sat there in shock, and I could cry, but then I realized it was not entirely my fault. 

I will continue writing, but I am now more guarded.